Roommates or lack of them...

sooo, me and the ex have decided to stop paying the mortgage. after a run of crazy roommates that won't or can't pay rent the stress of being a landlord is just tooooo much.

so now this can be a blog about what happens when you stop paying the bank! sweet. all the cool kids are doing it.

What I have learned so far... find a friend or a family member to cash your checks. keep only the bare min in your checking account to pay bills and stuff. everything else... CASH. Yep, hide it in your mattress, in your socks, under the floor board, in your bra, wherever!

Use your extra cash to pay off credit card debit.

too gay to be functional- mean girls

need I say anymore?
My Grad Skol friend quoted it to me today and I laughed I almost peed my pants.

At least I have a dyke, coming over to look at the room tonight. I hope she is normal.

After I freaked out and told him that I was uncomfortable with him having a revolving door of men come in and out. I told him I barely know him and how well does he know these guys?

So this morning, 6am. What happens? He answers the door to some white guy and lets him in, now they are doing it. This type of behavior has been going on for at least a month.

EEEEW

Update on getting rid of annoying tenants

First, my ex told me to take all my posts off of facebook, that were about the awful roommate. "what if he sues!" He can't even write out a check properly, so how can he think of sueing? But i took them off anyway.

So, he gave me a check 2 days before rent was due, but as he is handing me the check he says, "but don't cash it until Wednesday." Um, 4 days after the due date. I told him no. I needed the money on the first. I cashed it. It bounced. well, part of it bounced. The bank put a hold on the funds for part of it.

day 4 past due..., I gave him his notice. I told him he needed to move out by the end of the month. He begged and pleaded. I said, how am i supposed to trust that he will pay me when he hasn't yet paid for rent. (1st month was covered by the state). I told him that this is a business arrangement and that he needs to pay on time. There needs to be money in his account.

He begged and pleaded some more. I told him he could have until May 1st IF he paid me the full amount by March 15th. March rent, april rent AND $100 utilities.

Now, 5 days after the rent money was due, the bank emailed me and put the whole amount on hold. There is no way he will be able to pay me. He owes me $365. On March 15th he will owe me an additional $100. He is not getting his deposit back if he keeps this shit up.

I am sooooo glad he has been staying at his boyfriends house. I really don't want to see him. I was even feeling sorry for him today until i got the Bank email. Now i just want to change the locks.

OK. So, I have a new roommate. His name is RJ. He moved in and I noticed every day my towel was wet. My toothpaste used, my toiletries moved around. hmmm.

So I gave him a towel to use. We had a meeting about personal property. Mentioned toothpaste. towels, shampoo even. We all said just ask if you need something. We all signed the roommate agreement. he is still using my toothpaste.

I went out for my sister's birthday. HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!
I had two beers. I am now tipsy. A little drunk even.

I got out my sharpie when I came home. Wrote on my toothpaste tube. (I'll up load a photo later- being drunk with mechanical things is a no-no).

I asked my other roomie if that was too passive aggressive. She said yes. But she took a picture of it before I wiped it off!

letter to my realitor

well, I keep thinking about why am I holding on to something I will never be able to afford by myself. It's not like i have real fond memories, but it's a cute house, well kept, nice gardens....

I will always have to have roommates. so, if we short sell it, then yeah, my credit will be trashed. but only for a bit. Then if i build up good credit again, I can buy again in 5ish years. By then I can buy a house I can afford by myself. Or hold on until the market turns around. but who knows when that will happen. I feel like I am gambling with bad odds.

I just don't know if it is worth trying to do late payments, (when i can pay on time), just to get their attention. Or keep all the money I'm making off the roommates and just not pay. hahaha. store all the money in my swiss account. haha just kidding. OR just keep trucking along, praying I get good roommates that pay and don't annoy me too much.

why can't you have all the answers? geez.
thanks for letting me bitch.

Plus, if there are 4 people living here, 2 dogs and a cat when showing... might be a problem. and the basement doesn't have an egress window. so that would look bad. don't you think? What about listing it when there are no roommates for Aug 1st? or is that too late in the season?

I need you to be my magic 8 ball and tell me everything will be ok. I will be rich, the house will sell, I wont kill roommates on a regular basis, and my garden will be beautiful!!!!

haha
k
I'm really ok right now. just these thoughts keep me up....

As of 2/1/2009 new house rules!

Basic rules

1. Tenant is not authorized to adjust the thermostat, unless tenant is willing to pay the difference in the heating bills. Tenant will be asked to pay more for heat.

2. Tenant should not use other tenant’s property unless it is specifically ok’d by other tenant. Examples of personal property are as follows: towels, soap, razors, toothpaste, food, computers, laundry soap and other personal items. Please be polite and ask.

Common use items are dishes, dish soap, spices, oils, utensils, microwave, toaster oven, TV, DVD player, pots and pans that are hanging. Anything in the cupboards surrounding the stove are for anyone’s use.
(Emily and Tages have special vegan pots and pans, do not use)

3. Tenant is not responsible for the feeding of animals. Please do not feed Jax and Charlie unless I ask you too. No people food, unless you are willing to pay for medical bills and clean up messes.

4. When showering, use the fan during and after the shower to prevent damage. Turn it on at least 30 minutes. After showering, rinse with water and empty the lint trap in the garbage.

5. Quiet hours as follows: Sunday- Thursday After 10pm. Friday and Saturday after 12am. Quiet on Saturdays and Sundays until 10am.

6. If garbage is full, take it out. If recycling is getting full… fill a paper bag and bring it out in the garage.

7. In the common areas, clean up after your self. It should be clean and ready for the next tenant to use. Wipe up spills, dishes washed and in drying rack. Personal belongings put away.

8. Over night guests are limited to 2 nights per week. They must be accompanied by tenant at all times. No over night guests left alone in the house. No keys given to others unless authorized by landlord. Advanced notice is preferred for overnight guests.

9. Noise should be kept to a minimum. If it can be heard outside of the bedroom, it needs to be turned down.

10. Rent is due on the 1st. Utility payment due on the 15th. No exceptions.

Cuddly pets

I can't decide which story to start with first. ..

how about COCKROACHES!

Everyone loves them, wants them around because they are so cute and cuddly and SQUISHABLE!

For 3 months, I was searching craigslist for roommates. My ex was moving outta town with her new girlfriend and I needed a way to pay my mortgage. (our mortgage, yep, Wendy stuck me with it, but hey, she helps out when she can, so don't hate her too much)

So, I found two roomies, each 25 years old, have jobs. They seemed nice, funny, easy to get along with. The first to move in, Jessica, moved into the bedroom upstairs. The other, Leslie, moved into the basement. Both of them had broken up with an SO. Jessica her girlfriend of 2 years and Leslie her boyfriend.

Everything seemed OK. Leslie really lived with her ex boyfriend, but occasionally came over. (story for later...) Jessica worked a lot and went out with her friends. Adjusting to other people living in your house is very taxing. I was happy with the arrangement until...

they moved in.
Yep, the little itty bitty creepy crawlies.
cockroaches.
Not just one little guy, ooooh no, but 2 whole nests. Now, I have never lived/seen a cockroach unless it was the giant kind they have in Florida. So, I thought "eh, a beetle, get a shoe..." It was near my art room, my only sanctuary besides my bedroom. I squished it. Didn't think anything of it.

The next day, Jessica tells me she thinks she saw one in her room crawling out of her laundry basket. She was pretty sure it was a roach. Ew Ew Ew!

A couple days later, I woke up super early, go into the kitchen and there is one just hanging out on the garbage can. I grab my nice going-out-and-dancing-shoe and chase it and squish it. This one I scooped up in a baggie to show the exterminator. Who I promptly called, in tears.

He came out, calmed me down and verified that it is a roach, a German Cockroach.

I almost barfed. Why me? How did I get them? Did one of the roommates move it in? I freaked out, couldn't sleep, and bought lots of plastic bins. I got rid of all my cardboard. No boxes, no paper bags, any grain or cereal was in plastic. I think I spent hundreds of dollars on plastic bins!

The exterminator came out and sprayed, put out traps, and bait. Oh, Plunketts! My heros! They came out 2 times and the roaches stayed gone. My advise... don't go with Rainbow Pest Control, too expensive and they aren't gay. They should drop the rainbow.
Plunketts... cheaper and did the trick, nice and professional.

Intro

The other day I noticed I keep telling the same stories over and over. My friend Sarah C, encouraged me to start writing them down in a blog. Because I have so many interesting roommates, I have many horror stories to share.
So feel free to read my blog, and be happy these stories haven't happened to you!
Once I figure out how to upload my cartoons about it... hahaha...you will be in for a treat!